Yesterday, I was creating (putting together & writing) a Bible-based kids holiday program for a local non-profit our church is supporting. Then it hit me. I need to include a section guiding the facilitators on how to actually keep kids engaged.

Your heart is in the right place if you're trying to lead a Sunday School program well - but when the children ignore you, mess around, or are unfocused and uninterested, it can make you wonder if all your effort is worth it. Are they listening at all? Is anything going into their hearts?

In this article, I'll share my top tips for how to keep kids engaged in Sunday School's long lessons (for primary or elementary school age). This is lived-experience based on my own moments over the last 10+ years trying to teach groups of kids & supported by my Masters degree in Practical Theology with a specialization Youth Work.

May you find space here to pause, reflect, and abide.

Seven (7) Tips to Keep Kids Engaged in Sunday School

1. Don't talk down to them

2. Tell them what the plan is

3. Have a catchy saying

4. Choose your spot wisely

5. Acknowledge the distraction

6. Let them get their wiggles out beforehand

7. Pray for peace

Bonus: Let's talk about consequences

Vine Creative Studio holds a collection of what I like to call 'encounter tools', resources connecting hearts with Jesus. You're welcome to try one out with my free Workbook on Living as a Wholehearted Follower or Coloring page on the Fishes & Loaves Miracle.

1 - Don't talk down to them

In a setting where you're teaching kids about the Bible, it's important to remember how He teaches. God's voice comes as a gentle whisper (1 Kings 19:12) and Jesus let the children come to Him (Mark 10:14) and the Holy Spirit is our Helper and Comforter (John 14:26).

• Get down on their level.

• Look them in the eye.

• Lower your voice.

• Talk slowly and clearly.

• Speak to them with respect, like you would to a trusted friend.

• Don't talk down to them - go sit on your knees, whisper, and chat with them.

It helps to give each child a name tag. It works if you can call them on their name! It's equally important that you need to wear one & introduce yourself to them (every week). Respect is a 2-way street. Tell them who you are, why you're there, and...

2 - Tell them what the plan is

Children are often expected to go with the flow as adults drag them along. People tell me all the time 'Yes, but kids are so resilient' - Sure. They can take it. But do they have to?

It's incredibly helpful if you can give kids a heads up.

• "In 5 minutes, we will put away the ball and start our lesson."

• "Today, we have one hour together - we will play, read the Bible, do an activity, and pray."

• "Let's sit down for the lesson now - I promise it'll be short and sweet."

• "After this, you will have a chance to make a cool craft."

• "There are 10 more minutes before church ends and it's time to go home."

I got into more detail about this in my other post: 10 Elements of a Kids Program that Works!

Extra tip: It's important to make your lesson interactive so that the kids do have moments where they can raise their voice / opinion about the topic. Sometimes they're not trying to be naughty or disruptive, they are just unsure of their role. You can make it clear by saying: "Thanks John. Right now, we're listening and after this there will be a time for discussion."

This acknowledges the child's need (to be heard) without making it a whole thing.

3 - Have a catchy saying

Choose a specific method that you will use to get their attention when you've lost it.

This is especially nice if you can do the same one every week. It feels like a 'family rule' and makes the kids feel like they belong, they know where the boundaries are, and what the consequences are. (More on consequences at the very end of this article)

Some of my favorites are:

• "1, 2, 3 EYES ON ME" and the kids respond "1, 2 EYES ON YOU"

• "IF YOU CAN HEAR ME CLAP ONCE... TWICE... THREE TIMES..."

• "IF YOU CAN HEAR ME TOUCH YOUR... NOSE... MOUTH... FEET..."

• "QUICKLY, TAKE SOMEONE'S HAND AND LET'S ALL FORM A CIRCLE"

• PLAY A SPECIFIC SONG OVER THE SPEAKER (it helps to use the same song every time)

• GET THEIR ATTENTION BY REVEALING SOMETHING: A BALL, A BALLOON, A TREAT

If you are interested in more free tips about what to say (and what not), read my post on the words kids ministry leaders use.

4 - Choose your spot wisely

Now, we're moving on to if the kids have a hard time focusing while you do the Bible lesson specifically.

It helps to:

• Choose 1 place where the lesson is done each time

• Stand where there are fewer distractions (not next to the entrance)

• Use a physical Bible, real props, and other sensory elements to keep their attention

Where you choose to stand / sit when doing the lesson portion matters. If you are standing up and the kids are sitting down, can they see your face? Can they hear you?

I prefer sitting down on a chair, having the kids sit in a half-moon, facing me. I use my body language, gestures, and facial expression to keep their attention.

• Sit with your back to a wall / not an open space behind you

• Limit visual clutter around you / and ensure the lighting is good

• Can you see a 180 degree visual of the room? Can you see each kid?

Extra tip: If you have a big group of larger than 10-15 kids, you might want to consider splitting them up into smaller groups. This helps to create safety and a feeling of belonging for the children.

If it's not location that's the issue, it's probably the CONTENT.

Kids can tell the difference if a curriculum or lesson plan is:

• Spirit-filled / lifeless

• interactive / dull

• fun and imaginative / rigid

• Bible-based / filled with false truths

I've worked with enough ministries and written enough curriculums for clients to be able to tell the difference too. The curriculum is the number 1 deciding factor of whether or not kids will be engaged in your Sunday School program!

Get one that includes: a story element, a Bible memory verse, a clear theme, practical responses, prayers, and a deep Biblical focus.

5 - Acknowledge the distraction

Sometimes it's really not the kids' fault when they get distracted and start losing focus. Other things can get their attention. These are usually sensory elements: they see someone walking in, they hear a loud sound, they smell something funny, they feel a shift in temperature... (Read more about Sensory Sunday School here)

• Do they feel safe in the room?

• Do they know what to expect?

• Do they understand what's going on?

What you want to do is not just tell them to "BE QUIET. SIT DOWN. STOP THAT." - but to take a friendly inquisitive approach. Think: What made them lose focus? And then, focus on it.

React to the thing that got their attention. Try saying: "Yes, there is a new person. Hello Sonja! Now, where were we? Look at me, everybody. Thank you. Let me continue to tell you about..."

This does not only work well, it builds trust. The kids see that you are attentive to them and trying to help them navigate the moment.

Unfortunately, distractions often come from your volunteers / helpers. It's important that the extra hands are not standing off to the side. Let them sit in between the kids. Read more about leading volunteers well here.

6 - Let them get their wiggles out beforehand

It helps to let the kids stretch, jump up and down, and move their bodies before sitting down. It sounds funny, but can you shift your program around so that they are physically tired when it's time for the lesson? Play first; Lesson next.

When all the kids come together for the program, excitement runs high. They're seeing their friends. They're happy to be in the buzz of Sunday morning. It's a lot!

Forcing them to sit down and listen just then and there will always be ineffective. But you can build your program intentionally to make the lesson the 'landing point'; everything leads to this moment where we finally sit down together and learn about God's Word.

• Stretch before the lesson

• Start by doing a fun activity together

• Do a worship song and dance before sitting down

• Physically move to a different designated space for the lesson portion of the program (see above)

Something else I like doing is to say: "Can you touch your eyes? Okay, we are going to use them to listen now for three minutes. Can you do that?"

Hint: Worst case scenario, give them something like a lollipop to keep them quiet while you teach!

7 - Pray for peace

This is the last number here, but it should be first. Prayer is crucial! Kids Church is still a real ministry time, after all.

I've been in many settings with groups of kids where none of the above works. Suddenly, I realize it's not a literal issue, it's most probably a spiritual one. I pause. I pray. And a certain calm falls over the space as the Holy Spirit takes back authority.

You can pray for peace during the week, pray during the run up to the program on Sunday morning, pray over the room or space before the kids come in, pray during the program, and pray as a debrief with your volunteers afterwards.

While reading this article might help you tackle some nuances of what's going on in Sunday School, it cannot do it all. But God can. He knows each child by name (Isaiah 43:1). Jesus is the Prince of Peace! (Isaiah 9:6)

Let's talk about consequences: Clear step-by-step discipline plan for when Sunday school kids act out of line

What do you do after you've done everything up here and the kids STILL refuse to listen?

So first up, let's rewind to how you start your time with the kids. I like having a 'class rule' in every kids program I facilitate. Repeat the class rule at the start of your time together (yes, every time). It can be something like:

• "We are kind, open, good listeners, and children of God."

• "I will respect others with my words, my actions, and my attitude."

• I have a full-body scan one when they declare Scripture over themselves: linked here

What happens when kids break the rule?

Consequences are necessary. When learning how to discipline children, they teach us about the importance of not giving empty threats. I like having a clear discipline-method that is repeated along with the class rule (yes, every time!!). It can be something like:

• "1st Warning, 2nd Warning, 3rd time you have to go to big church."

At each "warning", you point them back to the rule and give them the option to be better . So, if someone acts out of line, you get to point them back to the rule:

"Remember, we are good listeners here. So, let's try that again, shall we?" , but after the 3rd warning, there has to be a consequence.

Have a volunteer walk with the child and take them back to their parent for the remainder of the service. I have another article on partnering with parents, where I go into more detail about this.

So yes - That's how I usually go about discipline in a group setting when kids get out of hand.

Our job is to de-escalate the situation. If we scream and shout louder than they are, we're sending the opposite message of what we want to. They will also take you less seriously the more frazzled you become by them acting out.

Cool, calm & collected. Remember, you have the authority and power of the Holy Spirit to be God's witness to these kids (Acts 1:8). You got this!

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