Nehemiah wept before he built

Faith isn't emotional denial. The Bible is full of examples of people who understood this, and one of them is Nehemiah. Most of the time, we focus our reading of Nehemiah's life on gathering growth principles, leadership advice, or project tricks - but we miss something crucial in doing so. Before Nehemiah did any of that, he wept. This blog post is my exploration of how Nehemiah is an example for us to ask questions, listen, be present, and feel; before we jump into fixing.

May you find space here to pause, reflect, and abide.

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When making the case for emotional awareness instead of a disembodied faith, there is perhaps no better example found in the pages of Scripture than that of Nehemiah. Nehemiah is known for restoring Jerusalem's walls, being a bold and righteous man, yet our reading of his life story tends to skip what came before. Something significant is hidden in the verses right before Nehemiah jumps into action:

The verses we skipped:

¹The words of Nehemiah son of Hakaliah:

In the month of Kislev in the twentieth year, while I was in the citadel of Susa, ² Hanani, one of my brothers, came from Judah with some other men, and I questioned them about the Jewish remnant that had survived the exile, and also about Jerusalem.

³ They said to me, “Those who survived the exile and are back in the province are in great trouble and disgrace. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates have been burned with fire.”

⁴ When I heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven. ⁵ Then I said...

Nehemiah did not just flee to Jerusalem and throw himself into building that wall. He did not rush into action, aiming to get results.

Our fascination with this Bible character is usually focused on mining for leadership principles or even project planning steps - but I'm convinced that what came before all that is foundational.

Yesterday, I wrote about how faith isn't emotional denial  - and Nehemiah is the perfect example of that. His faith propelled him to BE in the moment, HEAR the news, and FEEL it.

Before Nehemiah built, he wept.

And even before that, He asked questions and listened.

Let's take one action at a time:

ASK QUESTIONS

Verse 2: "I questioned them about the Jewish remnant that had survived the exile, and also about Jerusalem."

Asking questions is something that we, Christians, are often afraid to do. As if asking a question is a sign of doubt. We are afraid of expressing the things we wonder about and the things we feel uncertain about. Often, the first step toward emotional numbness is this refusal to ask questions. By allowing ourselves to bring the questions to God, we practice approaching Him wholeheartedly.

LISTEN

Verse 4: "When I heard these things"

After Nehemiah's question was voiced, he listened. He did not jump to conclusions, think he could do it all by himself, or interrupt them. In our own emotional turmoil, we might ask questions without pausing long enough to hear the answer. Especially when God's answer is not the one we wanted to hear. The Holy Spirit still speaks today - Are we quiet enough to hear Him?

WEEP

Verse 4: "I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven."

After listening, Nehemiah took a moment to be present and feel the significance of what he'd heard. This is the big thing I often miss. I tend to jump into the next to-do, instead of sitting with what I'm feeling.

Nehemiah's tears were not a sign of a lack of faith; they were a sign that he cared. Even Jesus wept. The idea that our emotions should be shut inside is not from Him.

He did not rush past his emotions, but he took them seriously. More importantly, he took them before God. Nehemiah understood that God could handle the depths of his emotions - he mourned for days! He did not bottle it up or shove it to the side. He felt it all.

This is something that I think we miss so often: We expect ourselves (and others) to bounce right back up. We don't often hold the space for sitting with news, weeping, mourning, fasting, praying. Yet these were the actions that prepared Nehemiah for the journey ahead. He wept before he built.

Most of us admire the walls Nehemiah built, but perhaps the real miracle began days earlier when one man refused to rush past grief. Sometimes the most faithful thing we can do is not build, fix, solve, or achieve right away. Nehemiah's tears preceded his "great" calling.

I've seen many times that what upsets us points to our calling. What makes us mad is the thing we're supposed to do something about. What stirs our hearts are the things we should walk in. God wants to redeem and restore the brokenness in the world & he wants to do it through you.

It was only after this that Nehemiah was prepared to take action.

He asked.

 He listened.

 He sat down.

 He wept.

 He mourned.

 He fasted.

 He prayed.

 Then he built.

I'm beginning to think emotional awareness is not just a good idea - it might be the very thing that sets a person up for flourishing and walking in the plans God has for them.

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." - 1 Peter 5:7

When we deny our feelings, suppress our emotions, and bottle it all up inside; we are less effective. But when we acknowledge the feeling, release our grip on it, and offer it to God on the altar, we are free.

Free to walk in our calling. Free to walk with our rabbi. Free to build what's needed.

Questions for Reflection / Journaling Prompts:

1. What do these verses show you about the relationship between emotional awareness and faith?

2. Is there a question on your heart that you've been scared to ask?

3. Can you pause long enough to listen to God's answer?

4. Nehemiah cried before he built - What needs to precede your action?

5. What do you need to do today: sit with it, weep, mourn, fast, or pray?

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